Purfylle: Finding Calm

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Thursday, 28 April 2016

Finding Calm


When I get overwhelmed with all the stuff that needs to be done I find I don't want to do any of it even though logically I know that doing part of it, no matter how small, will help.

Sometimes taking a break is all I need to get back into the swing of things.  

Sometimes just doing it anyway will get the flow going again. 

Sometimes doing something that is not what I'm supposed to be doing will leave me refreshed and ready to jump back in. 

And sometimes I just need to decide not to do it all and let it go.

The hard part is knowing which of those is the one that I need this time. I know that a contributing factor to my allowing things to get chaotic is my shoulder and back problem and until the ultrasounds are done there's not much more I can do other then work around it. 

Yesterday I had planned to get some of the blog and computer related tasks done, instead I did laundry, dishes, swept, took out the rubbish to fill the bins for collection day. I sorted stuff that is to be sold / decluttered / up-cycled from being all piled together to being clearly defined categories, and I started work on an up-cycle project.

I felt like I had made progress and was ready to face the computer but I had run out of oomph and out of day. 

Today, I woke up feeling overwhelmed again with all the tasks ahead of me, I felt like I'd made no progress yesterday.

It's also cold, which means that summer is well and truly over and winter is not far away. With the cold weather here I see all the tasks that didn't happen over summer that I wanted to achieve.

It is so easy to focus on what I haven't achieved and I'm sure that I must have gotten quite a bit done but that doesn't make me feel any better about it all. 

I've been asking myself a lot lately about my priorities and direction as they seem scattered and unclear. But it's because I keep jumping ahead of myself. I know what my priority is right now. It's to get my house to feel like a home instead of a shambles. But it's not fun, I don't enjoy it, I don't want to do it any more, I don't want to write about it any more. I'm ready for the next phase, but my home is not.

So I gave into my need to declutter and organise despite my other to-do-lists and I flicked over to Gretchin Rubin's site to listen to her podcasts while I got to decluttering. Gretchin has these new mini podcasts in-between her regular podcasts. I listened to this mini-podcast on Outer Order Contributes to Inner Calm.



And it makes sense. I need to take that time to organise my home. That it's important I prioritise my home over other tasks. That I cannot give my readers the best of me unless I take that time. So that's what I'm doing.

I need to create some Outer Order so I can have the mental space to bring you some of the great stuff I've got planned. I just need to get it written and I'll be able to write it if I can find some mental calm.

I'm sorry if this post is a little haphazard and reflects my lack of inner calm, things are not very orderly around here at the moment.

12 comments:

  1. I think you'll get there eventually. I usually find focusing on the positive things and the little steps of progress made very useful. :)

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    1. Thanks Agy. I feel a lot better know that the pain isn't as bad. It can really be a drag some days.

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  2. Hi Stella, I am so the same. When I get overwhelmed my brain seems to shut down and I don't want to face doing anything related to the tasks at hand. I just want to grab the dog, my camera and keys and head out the door, the problem is that the tasks are still there waiting for me.

    Logically I know that if I tackle things one step at a time I'll eventually get on top of things, but sometimes I need to step back before I can step up.

    I'm sure you'll achieve your inner calm soon.

    xx

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    1. Logic doesn't really seem to get a foot in does it? A walk is always a good option and looking through the lens can help with finding another perspective too.

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  3. I'm in a very similar place, so I suppose I can't offer too much advice... But on really bad days, I remember some words I've heard often from old timers:

    Always make your bed when you get up in the morning. If you don't do anything else all day, you can say you accomplished something.

    It sounds silly, but it really does lead to a sense of accomplishment. And with that sense of accomplishment (sometimes) comes motivation to do more. And if it doesn't work, then at least you've made the bed that day :)

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    1. I'm a total believer in the bed making - but when you're shoulders are on fire it's a damn site harder then it should be.

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  4. You seem to apologize Stella and you should NOT !!
    If organizing your home is your 1st priority, and over blogging - who says it's wrong?
    It's not. You should do whatever feels good for you, and doing so - you'll find much more time.

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    1. Winnie, when I saw your comment it totally made my day. Thank you. Just being told it's okay to prioritise such a thing over all others made me feel a lot better.

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  5. Stella, I agree with Winnie!!
    You do what's best for YOU!! We all understand time crunches, and days of unmotivation, and pain!
    You're making progress- 1 step closer to calm!

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    1. There's been progress and less pain which always helps. Now if I could just get some of these darn house renovations done so it didn't feel like I lived in a dump...

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  6. Wait, did I write this? Because that's how I feel all the time. I've never been able to articulate these thoughts quite as well as you did, though, which means you're accomplishing more than you think!

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    1. You have like a hundred children though! If you only feel like this during waking hours you're doing really well :o) I'm glad I could put it into words for you, sometimes that can help too.

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